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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Day 1...

Well, now that I have the background laid out, I figured I'd comment on my day so far. I woke up at 10 am (I think that was way too early for me today) because my boyfriend's dog scratched the hell out of me to try to get under the covers. So I woke up mad, which isn't unusual these days.

So mad and angry I take my first dose of Abilify. We will see how it works. Since then, I managed to make myself a real breakfast of an egg sandwich and bacon and then cleaned it up. So much fun, but at least I managed that. Then I did more laundry. How the hell my boyfriend goes through a load of laundry a day is beseeching me.

Now I am at a loss, I can't seem to sit still but there is nothing I want to do. How am I supposed to deal with that? I figured a blog would work! :)

So now that is done, I'm going to lounge in my comfy clothes and read some magazines. Most likely cuddle with a dog and a cat or two. Hey, at least I even showered today....

* I realized grammar and spelling aren't quite what they should be, but give me a break, I'm on medication and depressed...

Today I battle....

Today I'm battling a crushing view of the world. I'm exhausted from anxiousness and it's causing me to go into a bit of a depression. Bit being "OMG I'm depressed!"

Not sure what started it all, but I'm damn sure I'm going to get myself out of this mess soon! A little bit of history. I've had a migraine (yes A MIGRAINE) since February of 2010. Before that I was getting them weekly. It all started after I quit smoking, the one thing that apparently let me blow off steam, literally and figuratively. My past two years have been hell and I think maybe, just maybe, now that I'm in a stable good relationship and feel safe, my mind and body is finally allowing me to feel all of it....I just wish it wasn't all at once.

So I'm going to try to go through my anxious depression day by day and hope that typing this stuff up helps me even just a little.